Holy smokes, can you believe it's been twenty freaking years of Call of Duty? As a die-hard fan who's bled virtual bullets since the original MW, I was hyped beyond belief for Modern Warfare III in 2023. But let me spill the tea โ๏ธ โ this game felt like getting a birthday cake made of cardboard after waiting two decades for a damn masterpiece! Sledgehammer Games had ONE JOB to celebrate this milestone, but instead they dropped what basically amounts to a $70 DLC for Modern Warfare II. Talk about a slap in the face! When I booted up that campaign and realized half of it was recycled Warzone maps? I legit screamed into my headset loud enough to scare my cat off the couch. ๐คฏ
Campaign? More Like Cringepain!
Let's cut the crap โ playing as Task Force 141 chasing Makarov should've been epic sauce. Instead, I got a 3-hour snoozefest where Open Combat Missions made me question my life choices. Wandering around empty Warzone locations with fewer enemies than a Tuesday afternoon at Walmart? Bruh. I finished three missions in under 15 minutes while eating a sandwich! ๐ฅช The only highlight was watching Makarov's villain origin story โ that dude's more twisted than my headphone cables after a rage quit. But then they recycled 'No Russian' and Shepard's arc AGAIN? Zero points for originality, Sledgehammer! This campaign was shorter than my attention span during tax season.
Multiplayer: The Glorious Hot Mess
Okay, let's give credit where it's due โ jumping into multiplayer was like chugging an energy drink after that garbage campaign. FINALLY, movement that doesn't make my operator feel like they're running through peanut butter! ๐ The slide-cancel mechanics? Chef's kiss! ๐ And thank the gaming gods they brought back red dots on minimaps โ now I can hunt campers like it's open season. Seeing all my MWII guns and skins carry over? That's what I call a pro gamer move! But then... the maps dropped. Afghan? Highrise? Terminal? Don't get me wrong โ I love these classics more than my grandma's meatloaf, but SIXTEEN REMASTERS AND ZERO NEW MAPS? In 2023? That's straight-up lazy development! And the bugs? Oh boy:
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TTK inconsistencies making me rage-quit harder than when I lost my first nuke streak
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Custom loadouts glitching like my ex's commitment issues
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That godawful Armory Unlock system requiring grindier gameplay than farming World of Warcraft mounts
Zombies Mode: Identity Crisis Central
When Treyarch's name popped up for Zombies, I did a happy dance. Then I played it. This Frankenstein mashup of Outbreak and DMZ had about as much personality as a cardboard cutout. Dropping into Urzikstan with random squads felt like speed-dating at the apocalypse โ awkward and tension-free. Where's the round-based chaos? The Easter eggs? The sheer panic when you're cornered by hordes? Instead we got busywork tasks that made me feel like I was doing unpaid intern labor for Shadow Company. Sure, it's better than Vanguard's dumpster fire, but that's like saying moldy bread beats eating glass. The only thrill came from exfiling with rare loot while zombies scaled so weirdly that some areas felt safer than a padded room.
At the end of the day, Modern Warfare III is the gaming equivalent of getting socks for Christmas โ functional but deeply disappointing. It's clear this was rushed out as filler until the next real installment. For COD's 20th anniversary, we deserved fireworks and cake, not this half-baked stopgap. The multiplayer improvements almost saved it, but the recycled content and bugs made me want to yeet my controller into orbit. ๐ So I've gotta ask โ was this rushed cash-grab the moment COD finally jumped the shark, or can the next Modern Warfare still bring back that magic?